The other night I was having one of those, I cannot sleep, there is way too much on my mind, type of nights. We all love those, right? Ha, not! I thought I was about to explode. You see, I have this memory that has been haunting me for quite some time now. A memory of something that was so long ago, yet my silly little mind continues to bring it to the surface. After playing events and words that were said over and over again, something just came over me. I sat up and said, “That’s it! Time for you to stop haunting me.” Amazingly enough, it left. It ran away so fast that I didn’t even get to say good-bye. I think it is exactly what I needed. I have been trying to say good-bye for too long, it just needed to disappear. I haven’t felt so free of myself in a very long time, and am singing out with joy for feeling this way. I realized that it was me holding on to it, not it holding on to me. Life seems to do this thing to me, where I think that I just need to hold on to something, someone, in order for it or them to stay real; to stay fresh. I think that this night was a “wake-up call.” As cliché as that sounds, I truly believe it to be real. It was all in my mind. So, after realizing this, I took a hold of myself and set things straight between my mind and my heart.
Now just because I say I set myself free from this memory does not mean that I never will think about it again. I just look at it in a different light now. This is something I have come to believe that we all must do. Just step back, take a deep breath and look at what we are holding on to. Is it really that important to be taking over your thoughts, your dreams? I miss this memory, very much, and will continue to, but it does not haunt me. Nor will I ever let it do so, ever, again. It is time to breath, to let go, to move on. It is time for me, and possibly you, it is time to find our souls, to find our peace. It is time to let our minds and our hearts be free from the past.
